My Hypnotism Articles

Don't blame me for ruining this picture. Peter made me do it.  (I used Microsoft Paint.)

(Click over there for my articles on alternative medicine.)

From HubPages:
Differences Between Hypnosis And Brainwashing
Self Hypnosis For Hyperhidrosis

From Yahoo! Voices:
Using Hypnosis for Weight Loss

My Air Purifier Articles

My theory is that if Peter Gabriel can breathe over everything, it's purified. However, my clients don't agreee, so I've had to write articles about those other kinds of air filters. Poopers.


From Savvy Cafe (Note: Savvy Cafe is in limbo since August 2012 as the owner decides what to do with it):
What the Heck is an Ionic Pro Air Purifier?
Ionic Air Purifiers Are Not For Everybody
Why Are Ionic Air Purifiers So Popular?
Use Ionic Pro Mini Air Purifier To Get Rid Of Smoke Smells ("It's tough for marijuana smokers today...")
Should You Get An Ionic Auto Air Purifier? (Not if you care about the ozone layer.)
Is An Ionic Pro Compact Air Purifier Worth It?

My Horseback Riding Articles

Yee-haw!

(Not to be confused with My Horse Articles or My Model Horse Articles).

From the blog Riding a Horse, where I am listed as Larrie:

You Better Know the Rules for Riding a Horse on the Road
English Horse Riding Gear for You and Your Horse

From the blog Horse Rider, where I am listed as Marco:
Don't Worry Yourself to Death About Horse Riding Injuries
What to Expect in Your First Horseback Riding Class

From Helium:
Horseback Riding: How to Post the Trot
How to Mount a Horse
Handicapped Horseback Riding For Children
Horseback Riding: How to Make the Most of Riding Lessons

From eHow:
How to Determine Correct Stirrup Length
How to Strengthen Legs for Horseback Riding
What Is a Riding Crop?

My Gardening Articles

The only crop I can grow successfully is stinging nettles. Even if I plant something else, it seems to always come up stinging nettles. I consider it a talent. Peter happens to be quite a good gardener (if the rumors are to be believed). Here he is in fall of 2008 planting roots in Berlin.

Other gardening related topics having their own sections include:

*My Orchid Articles
*My Lawn of the Devil Articles
*My Garden Hedge Articles
*My Bonsai Articles

From HubPages:
Common Cat Repellants

From Linkroll:
Three Best Landscape Software Programs for Regular People
What Can You Do with Landscape Software?
What are the Qualities of Good Garden Landscape Software?
Don't Ask Geeks About Home Landscape Software
Keep Safe When Checking Out Free Home Landscape Software
The Disadvantages of Free Landscape Architect Software
Where to Go for Unbiased Landscape Software Reviews

My Labrador Retriever Articles

Good dog, Pony (who is only part Lab).

If you want to read about canines in general, check out My Dog Articles.

From Helium:
Is a Labrador Retriever Right For You?

From eHow:
Training of Aggressive Labrador Dogs
About Seizures in Labradors

From Knoji:
Can Pedigreed Black Labrador Retrievers Have White Markings? (Short answer: yes.)

From Dogbadge.com:
The Yellow Lab Puppy In Advertising
The Unlikely Rise in Chocolate Labrador Retrievers
The Labrador: Superdog and Devil Dog
Housebreaking the Labrador Retriever Puppy
Avoiding Chocolate Lab Puppy Scams on the Internet
Black Dog Syndrome Even For Black Labrador Retrievers

From The Labrador Dog Guide Blog, where I am "Team Nick":
Should We Clone A Labrador Puppy?
Labrador Retriever Mix: A Good Bet for New Dog Owners
Officially, Golden Labrador Retriever Purebreds Do Not Exist
The Yellow Labrador Retriever: A Modern Day Cinderella Story
The Incredible Appetite of the Labrador Retriever
Photographing the Black Lab Puppy
Could that Labrador/Golden Retriever Puppy Be a Future Lifesaver?

From Pet Topics:
A List of Questions for Your Labrador Retriever Breeder

From Ezine where I'm transformed as "Brooke Sunderland":
Labrador 101: The Breed Standard

From Fresh Web Content/ also as BS:
What You Need To Know About the Labrador

From K9 Article where I am (a-hem)"Alpha Dog":
The Breed Standard of the Labrador

My Model Horse Articles

If you can't have a real horse, the next best thing is a model horse. And if you can't have the real Peter Gabriel, make crappy Paint composites of him riding to the rescue. If the rock star gig ever falls through, he could make a good cowboy.

I used to be heavily into the model horse hobby and stupidly sold or gave away 99.9% of my models before moving to England. Now that I'm back in Philly, I'm gradually buying some replicas of my childhood Breyers using money I get from writing about model horses.

(My aplogies to Appaloosa on Flikr, whoever you are, for altering your original photograph of a live show display.)

If you want to read about real horses, check out My Horse Articles.

From eHow:
How to Photograph Model Horses
Information About Painted Ponies
How to Safely Transport Your Model Horses (Hmmm -- article seems to have disappeared)
How to Display Model Horses
How to Touch Up a Scratched Model Horse
How to Store Model Horses
How to Run a Model Horse Photo Show
How to Choose a Model Horse for Live Showing
How to Straighten a Bent Breyer's Leg
How to Remove a Breyer From the Leg Clips

From DigitalCenterOne.org:
Good Photography Key to Model Horse Hobby

From SavvyCafe:
Digital Photography Tips for Model Horse Lovers

My Tupperware Articles

I wonder if Tupperware is good for storing musical equipment in. I guess you could always put ideas in there if you want to keep them fresh. I'm still trying to find one to store my memories of the 1980s, such as this image of Peter performing ca. 1986.

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From High Quality Articles:
I Want A Tupperware Impressions Tumbler
What Are the Value of Your Vintage Tupperware Tumblers?
The Evolutionary Advantages of a Tupperware Insulated Tumbler

My Insomnia Articles

Yup -- that pretty much what I look like after a bout of insomnia, too.

From The World Health Guide, where I'm "Healty Living" again:
What You Need To Know About Insomnia Medication
You Don't Want a New Insomnia Drug

From PrintNPost where now I'm "Doc David":
What Are The Best Insomnia Medication Side Effects You Can Hope For?
A Look at Prescription Medication for Insomnia
New Insomnia Medication: Meet the New Boss, Same as the Old Boss (Yes, I also like The Who as well as Peter Gabriel).

From Zimbio where I am "Venturist":
Treating Insomnia Without Medication for Third Shift Workers
Better Alternatives to Drug Treatment for Insomnia

My Motion Sickness Articles

Ulp.

From The World Health Guide where I ghostwrite as "Healthy Living":
The History of Dramamine, the Over the Counter Motion Sickness Remedy
Can a Bracelet Work as Your Sea Sickness Remedy? (Yes -- unless you're me.)
What you Need To Know About Motion Sickness Natural Remedies
Motion Sickness Remedies for Dogs

My Head Lice Articles

Let me clarify -- these are articles I've written about head lice in general, not about "my head lice" specifically, as I do not have head lice or other common pests.

And niether does Peter, apparently, after this monkey in India got through with him.

From LiceFreeHeads.com:
Getting Head Lice Is Not The End of the World (It does suck, though.)
Head Lice Treatment Made Moderately Easy (Step one -- hire a monkey.)

From E-zine where I ghostwrite for "Gloria Gangi":
Head Lice Alternative Treatments Can Often Work
Choose Your Natural Head Lice Treatment

From JustHeadLice.com (No, I'm not making the domain name up):
What is the Best Treatment for Head Lice?
How to do a Head Lice Olive Oil Treatment
Head Lice Home Treatment: Important and Effective

My Water Filter Articles

For a while, I had a job ghostwriting under men's names about water filtration systems, but it petered out (pun not intended, of course.)

Water is a key symbol in many of Peter Gabriel's works. There isn't an album (or CD) of his that doesn't have at least one song about water, the most famous of which are "Red Rain" and "Here Comes the Flood". This photo was taken in 2008 when Peter won the MIDEM lifetime achievement award. He had a broken leg at the time, which explains his awkward position.

From E-zines under the name "Jim Reiley":
Why Drinking Water Filters Are Better Than Distillation
How to Find the Best Countertop Water Filter for You
Shower Head Water Filters Limit Chlorine Exposure
Using Shower Head Water Filters When You're Renting
The Importance of a Home Drinking Water System
Why Drinking Water Systems Are Better Than Bottled Water
Can You Buy a Clean & Pure Countertop Water Filter From eBay?
What You Need to Know about Water Filter Replacement Cartridges
What You Need to Know about Chlorine Showers

From Article Alley, also as "Jim Reiley":
The Advantages of Shower Head Filters

My IRA Articles

Calm down -- this isn't about the Irish Republican Army, but about Individual Retirement Accounts. (Although the IRA would most likely make Individual Retirement Accounts more exciting, or at least have better accents.)

I highly doubt that Peter will ever be able to retire from being a rock and roll star, especially if he dips into his portfolio to fund investments like the one shown in this picture.

From Ezines, where I ghostwrite for "Mark Nennemann":
IRA Investing in Real Estate: Why Bother?
The Reasons for Real Estate Investing From Within A IRA
What the Heck is an IRA Custodian?
Is There Such a Thing as an Easy Self-Directed IRA? (I wrote the article and I STILL don't know.)

My Tanning Bed Articles

There's only one way to find out just how natural a man's tan is. That's right -- toss him into a crowd of frenzied concert goers.

From linkroll:
What the Heck are Tanning Bed Accessories?
A Primer on Tanning Bed Timers (The poet in me sometimes slips free).
Collecting Tanning Bed Catalogues
The Advantages of Canopy Tanning Beds
What You Need To Know About Solar Pacific Tanning Beds

My Car Articles

Sadly, not about Peter's first self-titled album, which has been nicknamed "Car" by the fans, but about actual cars. This photo was taken much later than the release of "Car". We think the other guy is saying, "Now, pay attention, 007..."

From Savvy Cafe:
What You Need To Know About Napa Auto Parts
Choosing a Car Parts and Accessories Online Forum
Parts for Cars: Why Many Cars are Stolen
Get Going with O'Reilly Car Parts
Advance Auto Parts Sell Advanced Auto Parts (Yes, they made me write that).

My Pandemic Articles

Whenver people start getting hysterical about a new Andromeda Syndrome, just do like Peter is doing here. (Image from June, 2008 in Aachen, Germany).

From The World Medical Guide where again I write as "Healthy Living":
Commonsense Pandemic Influenza Planning
How Safe are We with the Current Pandemic Influenza Plan?

From linkroll:
Could the 1918 Pandemic Influenza Happen Again? (Don't hold your breath).
How Big of a Threat is the Projected Bird Flu Pandemic?
Ton of Money to be Made with Pandemic Influenza Preparedness Hype
What You Need to Know About CDC Pandemic Flu Information
Where Can You Get Reliable Pandemic Flu Information? (From my articles, of course!)

My Heart Disease Articles

Not to be confused with My Relationship Advice or My Valentine's Day Articles. And, in case you're wondering, Peter's just making a dramatic gesture in the photo to the left. His ticker is just fine, thank you.

From The World Health Guide as "Healthy Living":
Hope for People with Heart Disease
High Cholesterol and Heart Disease Have a Lot In Common
Is There a Correlation Between Heart Disease and Fast Food?(Does the Pope shit in the woods?)
Eat a Balanced Diet and Heart Disease is History (Has a nice beat to it, doesn't it?)

From Free Health Care Info:
Strong Correlation Between Obesity and Heart Disease

From linkroll:
What Causes Congenital Heart Disease? We Don't Know (Kinda makes you feel and warm and fuzzy inside, doesn't it?)
High Cholesterol and Heart Disease: You Don't Want Them (Because some people need practical advice.)
Heart Disease Fatality Rate Higher in Women (That's because they have to put up with men.)
What You Need to Know About Vitamin E and Heart Disease
Heart Disease Facts for Dogs and Their Owners (Why should humans have all of the fun?)

My Power Tool Articles

'Nuff said.

From linkroll:
Power Tool Repair: Is It Really Worth It?
Where to Find Used Power Tools
Commonsense Power Tool Tips For Everyone
Skill Power Tools Gets The Job Done
What You Need to Know About Kawasaki Power Tools
Commonsense Hand Power Tools Safety Tips
Choosing a Power Tools Online Forum
the Types of Power Tool Accessories
Get More Power from Black & Decker Tools
Get the Job Done with Panasonic Power Tools(Could you tell I was close to deadline?)

My "We Don't Need No Education" Articles

Peter is not a college graduate, and yet he's more famous and successful than myself, who has not one but TWO college degrees. You know my Mom is proud. Peter does a few honorary doctorates, but they don't count. Even Peter suspects that they were a bribe from the college so they could get a free commencement speech.

This man has learned more than the rest of us put together, surely.

From Online Learning Haven:
Advantages of an Online MBA Degree
Types of MBA Degrees
Masters Degree Education: Pros and Cons (They changed my original title of "Masters Degree Education: Why Bother?")
Walue of a Masters Online Degree
Getting the Best Music Education

From Helium:
Are Our Schools Preparing Our Children For the Future (R U kidding me?)
Things College Professors Usually Hate

From linroll:
Is Graduate Distance Learning Taken Seriously by Businesses?
Finding Schools Offering Accredited Distance Learning MBAs
How to Spot a Fake Distance Learning Graduate School
The Growth of Distance Learning Online Graduate Schools
What You Need to Know About a Long Distance Learning Graduate Program
Is that Distance Learning Graduate Degree on that Resume Legitamate?
Finacial Aid for Distance Learning MBA Programs

eHow:
How to Survive Going to a Strict Religious School

My Woodworking Articles

I'm not sure what kind of DIY project Peter meant to do here, but I don't think Bob Villa (or Peter's health insurance) would approve. (Photo by Larry Fast).

From linkroll:
Don't Skimp On The Lathe Woodworking Instruction (Well, some people need practical advice.)
Going Green with Wood Working Machinery
Woodworking Equipment Shows: We Don't Compete for Ribbons
Woodworking Patterns: Why Bother? (True bit about my Dad in here).
Keep On Learning with Fine Woodworking Magazine

My Time Management Articles

Whatever the opposite of time management is, Peter is the darling poster child for. Not only has he been ten years between albums, but about 25 years between kids. It's part of his charm.

Then again, Peter can afford to take his time and produces incredible results. I just goof off, especially when it comes to writing time management articles.

From linkroll:
Importance of Time Management for the Telecommuter
How Can you Tell Good Time Management from Bad Time Management?
Teaching Time Management to Yourself
Should You Buy a Time Management Calendar?
Time Management Tips for Teachers in the Real World

My Home Security Articles

Here, Peter does a good impression of a home security system alarm going off during a rendition of "Sledgehammer". (Not to be comfused with My Security Camera Articles).

From Stats Sheet where I write for a variety of highly improbable names, including Quinn Redmond and Keil Newman:
What You Need to Know About GE Alarm Systems
Honeywell Alarm System: Busy As Bees
Where Can You Find Alarm System Reviews?

From WhatAlarm.com:
Effective Alarm System Parts: Putting It ALL Together
You Are Not Paranoid Using an Ademco Alram System

My Garden Hedge Articles

I still have nightmares about writing these articles. There's only so much you can say about hedge trimmers. So, I started giving suggestions about what you probably shouldn't do with hedge trimmers.

Here, Peter does his best imitation of a hedge trimmer (taken during the Warming Up tour of summer 2007).

From linkroll:
Remington Hedge Trimmer: Not A Joke
Get the Job Done with a Kawasaki Hedge Trimmer
Say Safe When You Sharpen Hedge Trimmers (The original title was "Stay Safe..." but for some reason, they changed it.)
Used Professional Hedge Trimmers Buyers Guide
Natural Privacy with Evergreen Hedge Plants
Finding the Best Hedge Trimmers for the Elderly
How Weedeater Hedge Trimmers Differ From Chainsaws (I think this was where I started to loose my grip).
What You Need To Know About Makita Hedge Trimmers
Extended Reach Hedge Trimmers In Topiary
Defending Yourself From Zombie Attacks With a Long Reach Hedge Trimmer ('Nuff said.)

My Lawn of the Devil Articles

I hate lawns.  I'm convinced that not only do lawns contribute to global warming, but also contribute to people being total assholes. And, despite years of watching his Digging in the Dirt video, I have yet to find Peter Gabriel taking root in my lawn.

But I love accepting money for writing about lawns.

From linkroll:
The Disadvantages of Lawn Irrigation
Why You Should Consider Removing Lawn Irrigation Equipment
What the Heck Is Lawn Irrigation Backflow?
Careers Involving Commericial Lawn Irrigation
The Importance of a Proper Lawn Irrigation Layout
The Advantages of a Lawn Irrigation Timer
Tips On Setting Up a Proper Lawn Irrigation Schedule
Lawn Drip Irrigation: Why Bother?
Finding Reputable Lawn Irrigation Companies
What You Need To Know About Green-Lawn Irrigation (The company has that little hyphen)
Should You Get A Timed Lawn Sprinkler System?
Why You Need To Get Your Lawn Irrigation System Inspected
Choosing the Lawn and Landscape Online Forum For You
Garden Lawn Sprinkler Mats for Underground Sprinklers
What Else Can You Do With a Lawn Sprinkler? (Where my tiny little mind finally snaps.)

From Helium:
Should Grass Lawns be Banned In Water-Restricted Areas?

From Happy Landscaping Now:
Environmentally Friendly Front Yard Landscaping Ideas

From Celsias:
Environmetally Friendly Lawncare Tips

From eHow:
Organic Tick Treatment for Lawns in Connecticut
Can Termites Live in Lawns?
Do Moths Kill Grass?

My GPS Articles

It's taken me quite a while to find all of my GPS articles. If I had realized that GPS meant Global Positioning Satellite rather than Guinea PigS, then perhaps I could have rounded them up faster from My Geeky Toys.

Meanwhile, my PG-dar still works on occassion. But he doesn't help by having one on me, too.

From Tools Review:
Always Know Where They Are With A GPS Locator Device
GPS Comparison for Campers And Mountain Rescue
Don't Be Afraid Of Discount Garmin GPS>
Automotive GPS Is Great, But The Surveys Are Annoying (Is pretty much all autobiographical anecdotes!)
Track Your Guina Pigs With GPS Tracking (Guess what GPS reminds me of?)
How Do GPS Systems Work?
Keep Track Of The Time And Your Child With A GPS Watch

From Techo News:
You Can't Go Wrong With A Portable GPS Device
Portable GPS Units Get You Back On Track
Why You Need To Read Online Pocket PC GPS Reviews

From Discount Computer Equipment, where I am rechristened "Ralph Jarvis":
The Four Kinds of Laptop GPS

From linkroll:
A Brief History of the Car GPS
Used GPS Equipment Sales for Contractors And Surveyors
GPS Tracking Watches for Alzheimer's Patients
Navigating Magellan GPS Accessories
The Ethics of Using Handheld GPS Hunting Equipment

My Celebrity Articles

Not counting Peter, of course. He has his own section. Here he is in late 2007 with Nelsen Madela and Sir Richard Branson at the announcment of The Elders formation.

From Helium:
Should Don Imus Be Allowed Back On The Air?
Why People Hate Simon Cowell (Because that's his job and he's quite good at it).
Commentary: Celebrity Gossip Magazines
Favorite Actors
Edgar Allen Poe's Early Childhood
Interesting Facts about Mark Twain
Tribute to George Carlin, Comedian

From Where We Relax:
The Need For Celebrity Gossip

From Dealing With Headaches:
Tom Curise: The Spirit of Migraine

My Migraine Articles

Yup, that's pretty much all I want to do whenever I get a migraine.

(Peter Gabriel image taken ca. 2008)

From eHow:
How to Manage a Caffeine Withdrawal Migraine
How Does Imitrex Work on Migraine Headaches?
Propranolol for Treatment of Migraine
Migraine Myths
The Cause of an Optical Migraine

From Yahoo! Voices:What is Causing My Migraine?
How Doctors Diagnose Migraines
How Long Does a Migraine Last?

My Real Estate Articles

I used to be homeless, and now I'm writing about real estate. I'm not going to write my autobiography because no one would believe it. In case you are having some of the problems I used to have, there are articles in a seperate Foreclosure section.

From linkroll:
California Real Estate Suffering In Houseing Bubble Burst
Common Mistakes to Avoid When Choosing Real Estate Agencies
A Look At Real Estate Market Blogs
Real Estate Investing for Beginners
The Advantages of Using Real Estate Companies to Sell Your Home

From Rental Property Repair, LLC, where I am "Dr Green":
Real Estate Investing: How To Get Motivated Sellers

From Ezines where I am writing under the name of "Mark Neumann":
The Reasons for Real Estate Investing From Within an IRA
and under "Gary K Landry":
What You Need to Know About TIC Market Risks
TIC Management Risk in Plain Englsish
TIC Liquidity and Exit Strategy Not the Same Thing

From Articlesbase where I am "Kathryn Landry":
What the Heck is a TIC Resale?
TIC Refinancing Problems in Plain Englsih...Well, as Plain as We Can Get (Wow -- they kept the title).

My Halloween Articles

I love Halloween. Thankfully, no pictures of me in Halloween costumes exist. Here, Peter goes trick or treating as a cymbol.

From linkroll:
Unusual Halloween Treat Recipes
Fun Halloween Activities For All Ages
Finding Free Halloween Graphics For Your Website Or Publication
Make Your Own Halloween Sound Effects
There Are Good Halloween Games For Teens

From Where We Relax:
Early October Stress Tip

My Cold Sore Articles

My God, Peter, don't touch that -- it could be contagious! Oops -- too late. (I don't care -- I'll still kiss him.)

From www.TheHealthGuide.org/ where I am dubbed "Admin":
What You Need To Know About Herbs For Cold Sores
What To Use On A Cold Sore On Your Lips?
How To Heal a Cold Sore Without Going Bonkers
Is There Anything Worse Than White Cold Sores On the Tongue?
When Can You Catch A Cold Sore? When You Run really Fast (Couldn't resist -- sorry!)

My Prognostication Articles

Here, Peter brings his crystal ball to a Prog Rock convention, misunderstanding completely what Prog Rock is about.

(These are not to be confused with My Metaphysical Articles...not in this lifetime, anyway.)

From Yahoo! Voices:
Are Tarot Cards Useful for Atheists and Agnostics?
Can Leos Be Faithful Sexual Partners?
What Scorpio Women Need to Know About Love
Why I Like Psychic Sylvia Browne's Books
Lady Wonder, the Psychic Horse
How to Avoid Internet Fortune Telling Scams


From Helium:
How Do You Read Tea Leaves?
Are All God's Children Psychic? (Short answer: Depends which God you're talking about.)

From Continental Girl where I have been rechristened "Food Lover":
Using a Cast-Iron Griddle to Tell the Future

From BlueWiki:
How to Read Palms

My Spanish Adventure Articles

Yes, I know you can't see the guy's face clearly. However, when researching cycle tours in Spain, I came across this image and I'm positive it's Peter. Facts do not get in my way when looking for Peter.

Am I a sad git, or what? Or is he following me?

For articles about Travel to Random Places, click on the funky highlight.

From Kamakazie Portal:
If You Love Sun And Golf, Spain Travel Is For You (The keyphrase I had to use was "golf spain travel". OI!)
Let Your Africa Travel and Spain Adventure Begin! (Here, I had to keep repeating "Africa travel & Spain adventure")
From the US Air Force, Spain Travel Vouchers
Vacation Hotel: Spain, Travel Discount Possible
With Travel Agencies, Spain Vacations Safer

From linkroll:
Camping on Spain Beaches: Travel Fun (Not my best title, I know.)
Christmas Travel to Spain: Are You Insane? (Mainly on the plain...)
What the Heck is Counting Crows "Holiday In Spain"? (Hint -- it has nothing to do with traveling to Spain).
Staying Safe with Spain Holiday Rentals
There Is Such A Thing As A Fun Spain Cycling Holiday

My Motorcycle & Scooter Articles

This was as close I could find of Peter riding a motorcycle or a scooter. For the record, I don't believe you need insurance to drive a Segway (yet -- just give it time...)

From linkroll:
Finding Auto and Motorcycle Insurance Quotes Online
Motorcycle Insurance in North Carolina: It's Possible
What Do You Need to Get Motorcycle Insurance? More than Just Money
What the Heck are Motorcycle Insurance Forums?
Say Aloha to Hawaii Motorcycle Insurance (Sorry -- couldn't resist.)
What the Heck is a Schwinn Electric Scooter?
Necessary Mobility Scooter Accessories
What You Need to Know About Heavy Duty Mobility Scooters
The Newest Toy for Grown Ups: The Snow Scooter
Scooter Tuning Safety Tips

From ReasonsNotToCommitSuicide
Are People Who Ride Motorcycles Without Helmets Suicidal?

My Writing On Helium Articles

Helium is a lovely little online web content brokerage that pays you literally a penny for your thoughts. But you can't choose your article titles. However, it's a lot of fun, offers lovely lucrative contests, contact with other writers and the all-important clips for your freelance portfolio. And they let me write about Peter Gabriel. I think I'd go mental otherwise and the world would suffer my wrath.

You're welcome.

Click a few words to the right for articles About Ghostwriting & Writing in General.

From eHow:
How to Write an Article for Helium
How to Rate Articles on Helium

From Helium:
Top 10 Ways to Lose My Vote in the Helium Rating System
Rating on Helium: How to Flag in a Constructive and Considerate Manner
How I Rate On Helium (Different from the actual title, I know)
Ideas About How Helium Got Its Name
Helium Writing Contests: How To Stay Motivated
The Reasons Why One Should Write for Helium

My Bath Articles

Not articles about the city of Bath, where I lived for a few years (and Peter, coincidentally), but about that room in the house with a tub and a rubber duck. The photo of Peter in the tub was a scan of a photocopy sent to me from an English fan, which explains this image looks so washed out.

(Runs for cover).

From www.BathProducts.org.uk:
The Advantages of Ceraminc Bath Accessories
You Can Never HAve Enough Bubble Bath Gift Sets
How to Shop for Animal Friendly Bath Gel
What You need to Know About The Bath Accessories Company
Women Want Bath Accessory Sets (Now you know.)

My Sunglasses Articles

Now, Peter, you really shouldn't use Kate Bush as a substitute for a decent pair of sunglasses to block harmful UV rays.

From Continetal Girl.com where I am listed as "Luvi":
The Devil Wears Prada Sunglasses (NO, I couldn't resist? Could you? Oh, you're lying.)

From SunglassesWebsite.co.uk:
What The Heck Are Gargoyles Sunglasses?
Gucci Sunglasses: Always Fashionable
You Can't Buy DJ Size "Sunglasses" at Your Opthalmologist ('Cause it's a crap remake of a killer '80's tune, "Sunglasses at Night")
Get in the Game with Bolle Sunglasses

My Marriage Articles

Well, not articles about my marraige, of course, since I've never been legally married (Don't ask). However, Peter likes marriages so much he's on his second. This is a picture of him with his first wife and first child back in the hairy days of the 1970's.

These articles are different from the ones in My Relationship Advice Articles and My Wedding Travel Articles (I think).

From MarraigeWebsite.org.uk:
Your Marraige Quotes Will Haunt You For The Rest Of Your Life
No Shame In Going To Marriage Counseling
What You Need To Know About Costa Rica Marraige Customs
Legally, No Common Law Marraige In The UK (Contains autobiographical information, sadly)
How To Get A California Marraige License

From Helium:
Worst Wedding Advice

From SearchYourLove Online Dating:
When A Marrige Is Interracial, Wife + Husband Need Teamwork (I had no choice of title.)

My Aloe Vera Articles

Let's pretend the plants all around Peter are aloe vera plants, shall we?

From www.AloeVeraWebsite.co.uk:
Have Celulitis? Aloe Vera Can Help
How To Gro Aloe Vera: You Don't Need A Gren Thumb
Aloe Vera for Acne: Part of an Overall Acne Management Plan
Why Drink Simply Natural Aloe Vera Juice (My kingdom for a punchline.)
Aloe Vera Cream: Good For You, But Not For Guinea Pigs (I can stick guinea pigs into any topic, I swear!)

My iPod Articles

One day, I hope to actually get one and carry my PG music everywhere... as soon as know that I won't immediately loose it. Perhaps I need them to glow in the dark.

From iPodAcessoriesSite.com:
What You Need To Know About An iPod Photo Accessory
JBL iPod Accessories Bring A New Dimension to Your Mp3 Files
On the Road Again with Bluetooth iPod Accessories for Cars

From My Tech Cafe:
Don't Be Scared of iPod Video Accessories

From Technology and Gadgets:
Designer iPod Cases: Why Not?

My Life Insurance Articles

They say fortune favors the fool. For those of us not lucky enough to be fools, we are stuck getting insurance.

(Taken at the 2008 MIDEM awards, where a broken leg couldn't keep Peter away).

From www.LifeInsuraceStuff.com:
Be Careful with No Medical Exam Life Insurance
Is Aetna Life Insurance Right For Your Life?
American Generian Life Insurance Company: Not Just for Soldiers
All About the California Life and Health Insurance Guarentee Association
What the Heck are Life Insurance Coverage Attorneys?

My Headache Articles

Peter might be able to laugh off a headache, but I find it a bit too painful to do so.  One of the reasons I get paid to write about headaches and migraines is because I suffer from them.  Joy. (Photo by UrbanImage)

From Yahoo! Voices:
What Are the Causes of Cluster Headaches?
Thunderclap Headaches: Symptoms and Treatment
Causes of Sex Headaches
Differences Between Headaches and Migraines

From eHow:
How Long Should a Headache Last Before Seeing a Doctor?
What Are the Causes of Nausea and Headache?

My Orchid Articles

Perhaps those are orchids on the pattern on Peter's shirt. Perhaps we should all call him "Wild Orchid", especially if he ever becomes a spy. That's all the excuse I need to choose this photo to of Peter to pair up with articles on orchids.

From www.GardenGrowth.com, where I have been given the totally original identity of "Gardener":
Wild Orchids In Alberta, Canada?
Are There Such Things As Easy to Grow Orchids?
Growing Orchids for Beginners: Are You Insane?
Haiku Orchids Shows The Poetry of Hawaii

From Savvy Cafe:
Growing Orchids from Seeds: For Serious Gardeners Only